Q - Dear Annabelle, I am a recovering drug addict. I met two guys in rehab. While we were in there I came to care for each of them very deeply. Their names are Nik and Rick. Nik lives two hours away and Rick lives 10 minutes away. Nik is the type of guy I always dreamed of being with. He is honest and caring and romantic and he wants a relationship with me like I do with him. Committed and monogamous and forever. Rick is a really nice guy and neither of us really know anything more than we are sexually attracted to each other and care about each other. Both of them ask me about the other because they are jealous of each other and when I talk to one about the other I make it seem like the other one is just a friend. I wish I could be more honest but I don't want to lose either of them because both of them mean a great deal to me. But I know if they ever talk I will lose them both probably. This is causing me a lot of unneeded emotional stress. I have not yet become sexually involved with either of them but it is coming close with both and I want to have this figured out before intercourse occurs with either of them. Nik is the type of guy I could love and be with forever. Rick is the type of guy I could be very close to and care a lot about but I don't know yet whether it could be more than just two friends who are together in an intimate way. Both of them are very special to me and I can't figure out what the best and right thing to do would be. The only option I see is to keep enduring the stress and do what I have been doing until I can be sure I am making the right the decision. I am sooo confused and feel like i am going insane. I could really use any advice besides my own. Can you help? Thank you. A - Dear Jacquelyn, Stop...now. I will be brief. You have an addictâs personality...AND you are 17. Translated, that means that you went to recovery (*CONGRATULATIONS*!) and have now substituted your new friends for Îthe substanceâ. Stay OUT of emotional entanglements, AND SEX!! (that can be an Îaddictionâ too, you know, witness the current struggle going on in our Nationâs capitol!).....and away from other substances, for TWO YEARS. Work very hard in therapy to get a handle, not only on your behavior patterns, but on more completely understanding just how it is that your SELF needs Îsomethingâ to keep the anxiety level down. Addictions DO have a genetic component. Work hard on getting yourself under control. I understand your need for what seems a Îbenignâ pleasure......in your case, itâs not and youâre moving toward another form of addiction. Talk with your counselor about this. Iâd like to give you a more Îwarm and fuzzyâ answer, however, in your case, your full attention to beating this problem is required. - Annabelle