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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I've been going out with her for about a year and a half. She's 13 and I'm 14.
We always got along great. One day she left me a note giving me an excuse that her ĪMom wouldn't let her go out with me anymoreā. (I know this isn't true though). Her Mom always liked me and said I was 'perfect' for her. I talked to some of her friends and they said she hated me. I talked to them again a few days ago and they said she still loves me and misses me. I miss her too and I want to get back together with her too. I'm confused and afraid to talk to her. She won't even speak to me anymore. I don't know what to do. Please help.
A - Dear Alex,
Oh dear......I can only guess at what, (may have), happened. Youāve been seeing her at that really peculiar stage in life when preadolescents and early adolescents sometimes do REALLY dumb things...like write fantasy stuff in diaries or make inappropriate phone calls.....(or whatever). I have NO idea what the Ītruth of the matterā is....it could be that sheās just going through a Īdifficult periodā and has put herself in an awkward situation by saying something stupid and untrue.....or it could be something else. Now, this is a really good chance for YOU to do a sort of Īgrownupā thing and write a note to her mom telling her what you told me.
When I say Īwrite a noteā I mean, using your BEST handwriting, or a typewriter, (do they still have those?), anyway, using a mechanical-device-producing-perfect -lettering, write a clearly worded, thoughtful letter telling her mom what you have told me, and then send the note through the U.S. mail, (33 cent stamp). Express your concerns and thoughts, and ask for clarification. Offer to come over with YOUR mother, or father, if necessary. (These are called the ĪBig Gunsā). I donāt know WHAT happened, but I DO know that, if you act in a mature manner, and with respect and integrity, you will more likely receive a clear answer to your concerns. Now, her parents, as do yours, have the FINAL say on what their child does and with whom they associate.......(thatās just the way it is), and, when you are very much older, and a parent, you will more clearly understand this.
I lost a very dear girlfriend during my high school years because of a smart remark Iād made about going drag racing with a guy.....(a total fantasy), but the girlās mom wasnāt about to take chances. That I was the total square in the neighborhood and that MY mom went with me to her house made NO difference....those words brought the end of the friendship.......and I learned a painful lesson. I donāt know the genesis of your situation, it may work out well for you yet. I certainly hope so. Good luck.
- Annabelle
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