Q - Dear Annabelle, My question is: should I be with the love of my life? We have been on and off for about four years now, and during this time he has been in and out of detention centers. I know I love him and that he loves me, but I just don't know what to do. Should we be together or forget it? A - Brandi, Youāre 18, and have been with this fellow since you were 14..............he is, from what you say, a conduct disordered personality and may also be a sociopath. In any case, why would YOU hitch yourself to someone who will not inspire you to be YOUR best and whom you cannot trust? ĪBad guysā are just that....āb-a-d-g-u-y-sā He has not shown any interest in rising to his full positive potential, and for you to spend time yearning for him indicates that YOU have a need to be with someone whom you perceive to be Īless thanā you are........that is not a good plan. You do NOT go through life Īrescuingā people. People are responsible for their own behavior and their own choices.........and his choices have not, nor are they likely to be, good and responsible ones. For what itās worth, this fellow is not Īthe love of your lifeā.........you wonāt really find that until youāre into your twenties and have matured a good deal more and have developed yourself through your education and your focus on your future career. If you attempt to take a shortcut to a serious relationship with someone of this fellowās caliber, you will regret it very seriously at some time in the not-too-distant future. ĪRomantic loveā is not about hitching up with damaged people......thatās fantasy. ĪReal lifeā love is when two people, of about equal backgrounds and value systems, come together to build something glorious.......and that is something that is very hard to do from prison. - Annabelle