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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I think I am cute. What is the big deal about this cute thing? What IS Īcuteā, anyway?
A - Dear Ernie,
Some males are called Īcuteā by their female friends...there are several possible reasons for this. (Keep in mind that Īcuteā is an appellation that most males, over the age of 30 really hate...and for good and sound reasons, too. ) ĪCuteā connotes extreme youth...boyishness....and is often used, dismissively, by females when they wish to indicate that the male is not Īman enoughā for them......without saying so directly. Some females prefer to HAVE a Īmotherlyā role vis a vis a male and will call him Īcuteā.
There is almost NO context in which Īcuteā, used to describe an adult male, is a positive connotation. There are a couple of studies showing that the Īcuteā male, over 30, often has personality traits of great anger towards the Īmotherā figure, (which can translate into anger towards women in general), especially if the women, or women, is seen in any way to be Īless thanā the male had hoped, or seen in any way, by the male as having been 'deceptiveā, (in intent, behavior, whatever).
These studies describe the Īcuteā male as then directing what the Īcuteā male feels is Ījustified angerā into the form of a Ītantrumā, (something the Īcute maleā often has never outgrown or learned to transmorgrify into creative and positive ways). The Īcuteā male, (may), have Ītantrumsā and seek to Īdestroyā the Īdisappointing motherā.
Most males over 30 would prefer to be seen as Īmanlyā, Īmasculineā, (anything other than Īcuteā).
In my never-to-be-humble opinion, you, at 46, might want to take a look at your relationship with women and with the world. If you find that you operate from a position of manipulation, especially with females, or from a position of anger in an attempt to Īcontrolā your environment, then you are responding with Īearly learned behavior patternsā that would indicate an ongoing maladjusted response to early experiences.
One more thought, Īcuteā males also, (often), have problems either with alcohol or misuse of drugs to help Īsootheā feelings of inadequacy vis a vis the female.This is, (usually), evident at a time when stress is felt. The substance is used, the Ībrakesā of good sense are loosened, and the Īspewing forthā of the inner vitriol ensues......if any of this sounds familiar, you may want to give this question....and the answer, more thought.
Now, your question was brief and I may have gone into over-answer..........hope this was of some use.
- Annabelle
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