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Q - Dear Annabelle,
My girlfriend and I just got engaged a week ago and are very happy with our decision. Neither of us has any doubts about getting married or about our future. My parents are supporting us fully as well. The problem lies with her parents.
They seem to be quite concerned. It is, of course, understandable for a father and mother to be concerned over their daughter's choices for her future. Some of the concern seems to be over our age, (not that we are too young mind you). She is 20 and I am 18. Is there anything that I can do to help ease hear parents fears, or should I just stay back and let them work through it. I do not want to pressure them, but I do want them to know that I am willing to do what I can to counter their concerns.
A - Dear Kurt,
Yes, there are things you can do. Thereās an old, (and very true,) saying, something to the effect that Īif something is good, it will lastā. Now, if you and your intended are mature enough to be married, youāre mature enough to demonstrate to her parents that you have what it takes to keep their much-loved daughter safe.
You need to prepare yourself for a most excellent career and prove that you will be financially adept at providing their daughter, (and your future children....their grandchildren), a strong economic future. This is usually done by getting the best education that you can. When your letter arrived, it had several misspellings in it........perhaps her parents will be more impressed with you when they feel you have acquired a more advanced education..........(that almost always impresses parents).
I know that, when you are young, time seems so urgent. Wanting everything RIGHT NOW -- especially things that seem so terribly important, (and things do at this age), is very hard. Wait. Grow. Mature. If you Ītake care of businessā, her parents will see you as a valuable addition to their family
Much good fortune to both of you.
- Annabelle
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