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Q - Dear Annabelle,
My husband and I are separated and he is living with his mistress. I am getting on with my life also. He has been quite nasty during the divorce proceedings. I saw him on Saturday night at a social function. Yes he was with his mistress and yes I was with a gentleman. What threw me for a loop was that through out the evening my soon to be ex was making a big deal of dancing with his mistress, showing her off. I did my best to enjoy the evening which was not very hard. At the close he talked to me telling me how great I looked, asking if we could reconcile. All the while keeping an eye on
his mistress. I know the games he played. I know why he did what he put me though. But what I don't understand is why this now makes me hurt worse than when he left me for her?
A - Rosemary,
That you were married to a cad is no consolation when something like this runs straight through your defenses and pierces your still hurting heart. That he demonstrates sociopathically narcissistic behavior, (try saying THAT 5 times real fast!), is not much good either. Look, you loved him, you married him, things got really awful ...and you Īgot on with your lifeā. Nonsense. Thereās still a really hurting person lurking inside you, and to have the ex studmuffin rubbing it in your face like that is really twerpy. Be thankful that his behavior is so dreadful...and so churlish....how would you WANT your soon-to-be-ex to act.....with good character, sensitivity and elanā? Rosemary, if heād been THAT kind of person, you wouldnāt have put him in Īpermanent time outā!
- Annabelle
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