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Q - Dear Annabelle,
What would you do if your mate was making you miserable?
A - Tabatha,
What would I do? If it couldnât be attended to, Iâd put him in permanent time-out....(that may or may not be what you have in mind). In the first place, how is it that you allow someone to have such control over your life? I know, youâre 22 and may not realize that YOU, Tabatha, are in charge of your OWN happiness. Now, if this is a husband-type person and you have children, you have a much different situation than if there are no legal entanglements.
Tabatha, in order to HAVE something in this world, you have to know what it is you want. You also have to know what it is that you DONâT want........AND you have to know WHEN you HAVE what you want. And, then you have to realize that what you have IS what you want.....otherwise you wouldnât have it. (Complicated, isnât it?)
Now, I donât know just what it is that youâre letting Îeat youâ, but Iâll bet that a few sessions with a good relationship therapist would do you.....and your mate.....a good deal of good. (Even if HE wonât go, YOU go). It is a universal given that, if ONE component of a system changes, the entire system must change. This is one of the times in life where you have to have courage. It is courage that gets us through the difficult times. Yes, change hurts...growth of any kind is painful.......do you want to be asking this question in five years or do you want to spend the next several months making the changes that will propel you to the joyous and magical Tabatha you were meant to be?
- Annabelle
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