|
|
Q - Dear Annabelle,
I have had a friendly relationship with an attractive girl at work for a couple of years now. She is not married but lives with her boy friend of 7 years. I've been married for 10 years and have one child. Neither of us are overwhelmingly happy with our individual relationships but we are not unhappy. We both stay very physically fit to stay attractive. I have found that we bond together very well and have similar dreams and a lot of things in common. We really enjoy each otherās company and we both prefer to go to lunch with just the two of us just to talk about stuff.
I have been getting feelings lately that we could be more than friends. I think about her all the time and I wonder if she thinks the same thing. I never bring it up. I don't know if I am mentally ready for an affair anyhow but I would like to know what she is thinking. I also have to believe others at work probably think there is more to our relationship than there currently is.
My question to you is, how can I tell if she is attracted to me other than through friendship? Do men and women who are physically attractive commonly have good friendships that do not have to be sexual. Or is just wanting to be together and talk a lot show that we are both more interested in each other than we lead on to believe? How do I approach the situation if I want to bring the subject up? I don't want to hurt our friendship.
A - Byron,
Youāre cruising for trouble in your marriage and you know it. When things get difficult in a marriage itās often easier to just find another person to get the goodies from, rather than do the hard work of tending the marital relationship. What youāre talking about is a long and slippery slope.....not the quick fix you might imagine.
Take your wife and yourself to a good marriage counselor and commit yourselves to working on the vows you made before God on your wedding day. (Remember the Īfor better or for worseā part? What DO you think those promises meant?)
- Annabelle
|
