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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I have no one to talk to about this. I am interested in a guy who works, (not in my department), in an area that falls under my responsibilities. (I am not his supervisor). I notice him looking at me sometimes and we briefly talked several times, mostly about work-related stuff.
I really really want to go out with him!!! Here are the problems: I am 25, he's 36 I am married and have two children. (I have been thinking a lot about leaving my husband
before this new interest arrived) I know he is not married, but I also know he has a child and lives with a slightly older woman, although I don't know the nature of their relationship. (Please don't ask how I found that out!) I am starting to become depressed, which probably relates to many other things in my life, but I feel much down on those days when I don't see him, even briefly.
What should I do? How can I find out if he is in love with someone else and if his seeming interest is mere friendliness? I can't ask him directly because of office gossip and fear of embarrassment, and I don't want him to think I am stalking him or
something. I am close to some people in his direct office, but I am embarrassed to ask them of his status.
A - Dear Ricki,
What should you DO?? Ricki, youāre a wife and MOTHER and you DONāT have the option of becoming romantically involved with ANYONE outside your marriage......what
ever are you THINKING!! Remember those marriage vows?.......for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, in good times AND badā.....well, Ricki, you made a VOW....a PROMISE to yourself and to your husband.
What do you want to teach your children about life? That we keep our promises only as long as it Īfeelsā good? That we quit when we should be finding NEW ways to keep our promises? Ricki, not only will your childrenās live be impacted by your idle dalliance, but your grandchildrenās lives as well......and their children. Ricki, this is a question of personal integrity.
If your husband is a drunkard or a drug abuser, or if he beats you or the children, well, thatās different, but if this is just that the two of you havenāt been putting Īlove depositsā into your marital commitment, then, get yourselves to a marriage counselor and do the work that you need to do to see that your children are raised in a loving two-parent home.
Quit thinking of fooling around during those long winter nights..........with anyone but your husband.
- Annabelle
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