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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I had a 17 year-old boyfriend and we broke up two days ago. He says that he still likes me a lot and that he misses me.Do you think that I still have a chance? We are still talking. We talked on the phone for three hours last night. He said that Īhe wants to get his life togetherā, and that Īhe doesn't know what he wantsā.
A - Dear Amy,
The bad news is that youāre seventeen, and the good news is..... that youāre seventeen. Now, moving right along, yes, you Īhave a chanceā, just not the one you think you want.
You Īhave a chanceā to learn from this relationship more about yourself and what YOU do in life when you are disappointed.
You Īhave a chanceā to observe how another person struggles with growing and changing, and to see how that impacts on your self.
You Īhave a chanceā to understand how fluid relationships are at this young stage in your life when everything IS so quickly changing.
You Īhave a chanceā to try your own wings and -- flop occasionally, and, at other times, figuratively flying high with happiness.
Yes. Amy, this relationship has changed form, and young men are just as tender as are young ladies. Thatās why the literature is so full of romantic stories about young people...........itās when we are first learning to negotiate our way through life that we are most vulnerable.
He Īmisses youā.....and you him, because young people are detaching from their families of origin and getting ready to go Īoutā into the big world......itās a bit scary, so young people like to have someone to hold hands with while they make those first tentative steps. No one like to be Īabandonedā, but with all the changes and maturing that takes place between now and, (about), twenty five), you will find yourself better suited to someone else who is more like yourself. Not everyone changes at the same rate or in the same direction.
Life is hard as well as fun. Take it seriously, but with a sense of humor. Smile a lot, laugh often and know that the two of you will (probably) always be friends. Thereās a whole (new) world out there waiting for you, and that can be scary..........of course youād like the comfort of your boyfriend. I know that sharp pain you are feeling, itās happened to most everyone. No, it wonāt ever really go away, but it will become a distant memory and your life will be filled with new joys and laughter. It just takes time.
Youāre growing up now. Give him a hug and tell him that you appreciate the time youāve had together. If it really is time to part, that will ease his mind considerably.
You WILL live,.........itāll just take awhile to get past this.
- Annabelle
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