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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I'm in love with this great guy. I've known him for 3-4 years. We started dating, nothing serious. I saw other people, he saw other people. Last year August he came to me and said he had someone pregnant. It was like a "one night fling". He said he wanted to be with me. He accepted his mistake and told me to think about being with him. I thought about it and agreed to be with him. I thought I could handle the other woman and the baby.
Well the baby is here, and somehow I can't handle the situation. I have no problem with the baby. It's the whole idea about the other woman. He felt she trapped him in some way to have a baby. We do have a wonderful relationship, but he is kinda keeping away from that other part of his life, but I feel I should be involved Since we are planning on getting engaged soon. Shouldn't I be allowed to be part of that other life of his?
Should I at least meet that "other woman." It's eating me away. I'm not sure how to handle this. I thought of leaving the relationship, but I'm in love.
A - Dear Liza,
I must be in a really cranky mood today......are you out of your tree?? This is NOT any kind of husband material......at least not for you, unless you live in some renegade episode of the Jerry Springer show!! For goodness sakes, woman, this man not only had bad character, heās the father of another womanās child......and he is NOT a Īgreat guyā.
This has nothing to DO with you!! He didnāt Īmake a mistakeā....(a Īmistakeā is when you misplace your car keys)........he Īgot naked and did itā with another woman and produced a child for whom he is now legally, morally and financially responsible. A REAL man, would shoulder his responsibilities appropriately. (Would everyone please grow UP out there???!!!)
And, please, donāt give me this.....ābut Iām in loveā nonsense........āloveā, for this kind of low life just indicates that you have a very poor sense of self and a very dim view of you place in the world or the contributions that you alone can make. Do you REALLY want to team up with a person of such bad character? Youāre a slave to your emotions if you canāt tell this creep to take a hike. Someone who is the master of their emotions might feel a tug in his direction, take a note of his actions and not give him a second glance.
The world if full of people. Go forth and make a better choice.
- Annabelle
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