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Q - Dear Annabelle,
I really need some advice. Here's the deal. I have been dating a man for five and a half years and I am ready to marry him. He tells me that he is too. However, he has been saying this for the past five years. It seems to me that he is making excuses. For example: We went to school together, during his senior year I suggested marriage and he said that he wanted to be financially stable first. Upon graduation he got a good job and he told me he wasn't making enough money yet and wanted, at least, a promotion.
Now he has his promotion and money and told me that we will be married this upcoming year, after saving a certain amount for a house. Now I doubt him because it took so long. Don't get me wrong, he has helped me financially through school, during a national volunteer service that I served and many other things. He is truly a good man. But we have been living together for a year and I want more because I am uncomfortable with the situation. My question: Should I leave or stay? P.S. I love him very very very much (he is a true-blue friend).
A - Dear Corrie,
Well, he may be a Îtrue-blue friendâ, but it seems that he ALSO has a Îwhenâ script for life. As in Îwhen THIS happens......â, Îwhen THAT happens......â, etc. Should you leave? Absolutely. Youâre NOT married and itâs not a good idea to live with a guy youâre NOT married to...*e-v-e-r*!
Friends are friends, and Îhusbandsâ, while they ARE friends, are not likely to materialize from friends INTO husbands when you have this particular combination of events. Either he wants you and will marry you...(give him six months for both a ring AND a wedding date)......or he isnât. That sounds harsh, I know, but you DID ask my opinion.
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