|
|
Q - Dear Annabelle,
Please help me. My husband and I have a great marriage and sex life, but I'm worried
we are going too far. Recently we spent a weekend with another couple, and on the
second night, we had same room sex - i.e. we made love in very close proximity to the
other couple. We also played around a little, touching each other's partners.
My question is this - should I be concerned that we liked it so much? We have no
interest in the other people romantically, but it was such an exciting experience, we are talking about doing it again, maybe even going all the way with another couple.
Are we abnormal? Should we stop and never do this again?
A - Dear Michelle,
As is so often the case, the answer is in the question. You say you have ăa great marriage and sex life.ä Now you and your husband get to choose whether or not to keep it that way. ăGoing all the way with another coupleä is a sure-fire way to ruin it.
Why?
Well, for one thing, It can only be a matter of time before one of you --maybe you, but more probably your husband -- begins to wonder if some other man is more exciting to you in bed than he is. And he may well be right. Husbands and wives have responsibilities -- and arguments -- about a lot of things beside sex. A man who is only a sex-partner, and doesnât carry all the other baggage can be a lot more fun than a real mate.
You ăhave no interest in the other people romantically.ä Well, either the swinging sex is going to be great or it isnât. If it isnât , why bother? If it is, how long can it be before one of you develops a romantic interest in a partner who sends you to the moon?
Annabelle has no crystal ball. It is possible, though just barely, that the swinging sex will be incredible, and neither of you will develop a romantic interest in the new partner. What happens to your marital sex? Will it stand up to comparison with swinging? And you will compare it, ..........both of you.
Since you live in San Francisco, thereâs no need to talk about sexually transmitted diseases. Youâve heard plenty. Know that AIDS is only the beginning. Hepatitis 3 is just as awful, nearly as widespread and potentially more Îlethalâ just because it hasnât had the press .....or financial support....that AIDS has.. it
DOES have a couple of web sites. Take a read here. http://www.hepnet.com/nih/contents.html
*Being straight is no protection.*
The good news is that youâre only 27. There are many, many forbidden fruits that can be enjoyed within marriage, fun in bed that will strengthen the marriage rather than destroying it. At 27, Annabelle promises that you havenât tried them all......or even most of them. Trust me, over the next forty+ years things will pop up that you never eXpected. Once youâve exhausted your own imagination, look at the Kama Sutra and the many other books like it. Sex therapists recommend some of the improve-your-sex-life videotapes sold through newspaper book sections. Think about it.
And if none of that will do, if you and your husband feel a need to invite others into your bed, think about that, too. You may want to consult one of the many good counselors and sex therapists in the Bay Area.
- Annabelle
|
